when love and hate collide

can't stop the hurt inside..

how can i love and hate a person and a song all at at the same time?

i don't know what's gotten in to me.. last night i acted so badly.. just because of one song.. what's with 'your love' that makes me cry and break down?

i love that song.. i really do.. but in times like these, i hate it..

chai, you're right.. something hurts but i don't know where it is.. and i don't know how to ease the pain, heal the wounds, and get over it..

i spent my time looking for a perfect song to describe what i'm feeling today and why i broke down last night.. and i found not only one..

i'm not sure if i have mentioned this before.. but i have a new love.. secondhand serenade..

emo/rock/acoustic.. that's how he describes his music.. yes, secondhand serenade is composed of only one member.. john vesely..

and his story is really amazing.. i wish to have a lifetime partner like him.. someone who can sing me songs of love written with sincerity.. songs which came from the heart.. songs which not only contain words, but emotions..

why secondhand serenade?

"It's everything I would want in a band name and more. It basically sums up what I do. I write my songs about events and feelings that occur in my life, and I sing the songs to my wife. Everyone else gets the Secondhand Serenade." - John Vesely

isn't he sweet? i swear, he's really good.. and he hits me with his songs..

for more info, visit his myspace page: http://myspace.com/secondhandserenade

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You know that I hate this song
Because it was written for you
*I Hate this Song, Secondhand Serenade

And someday, I promise I'll be gone
And someday, I might even sing this song
To you, I might even sing this song, to you
and I was crying alone tonight
and I was wasting all of my life just thinking of you
So just come back we'll make it better
So Just come back I'll make it
better than it ever was
*Maybe, Secondhand Serenade

I lose myself in all these fights
I lose my sense of wrong and right
I cry, I cry
It's shaking from the pain that's in my head
I just wanna crawl into my bed
And throw away the life I led
But I won't let it die, but I won't let it die
*It's not Over, Secondhand Serenade

Will you stay awake for me?
I don't wanna miss anything
I don't wanna miss anything
I will share the air I breathe,
I'll give you my heart on a string,
I just don't wanna miss anything.
.....
And if it's a hero you want,
I can save you. Just stay here.
Your whispers are priceless.
Your breathe, it is dear. So please stay near.
*Awake, Secondhand Serenade

Take me with you
I will never let you down
I will love you now and forever
*Take me With You, Secondhand Serenade

I wish my life was this song
cause songs they never die
I could write for years and years
and never have to cry
*The Last Song Ever, Secondhand Serenade

I'll hold you closer and tell you I love you
but it won't matter in the end
It's obvious you're leaving soon
just another heart to mend
So what happens once you lose control?
When the future has to start
What happens when you're still in love
but time rips you apart.
Is there ever an answer
for when love is not enough?
*End, Secondhand Serenade

If you leave me tonight, I'll wake up alone,
don't tell me I will make it on my own,
don't leave me tonight,
this heart of stone will sing till it dies
if you leave me tonight
.....
I'm not the only one for you
but you're the only one for me
*Stay Close Don't Go, Secondhand Serenade

I never wanted anything the way that I want you
But my words dont seem to matter
*Tested and True, Secondhand Serenade

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven
*Your Guardian Angel, The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus

You're the only one I turn to
When I feel like no one's there
And when I'm lonely in my darkest hour
You give me the power
To sit and pretend
*Damn Regret, The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus

not related..

"if someone you love hurts you.. it's fine to cry a river.. just make sure you don't forget to drown the idiot in it.." <<--haha! thanks for this message leyn! i love it!

jaded

MOOD SONG:

BAD DAY

Where is the moment we needed the most
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost
They tell me your blue skies fade to gray
They tell me your passion's gone away
And I don't need no carryin' on

You stand in the line just to hit a new low
You're faking a smile with the coffee you go
You tell me your life's been way off line
You're falling to pieces every time
And I don't need no carryin' on

Because you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day
You had a bad day

Will you need a blue sky holiday?
The point is they laugh at what you say
And I don't need no carryin' on

You had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day

(Oooh.. a holiday..)

Sometimes the system goes on the blink
And the whole thing turns out wrong
You might not make it back and you know
That you could be well oh that strong
And I'm not wrong

(yeah...)

So where is the passion when you need it the most
Oh you and I
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost

Cause you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
You've seen what you like
And how does it feel for one more time
You had a bad day
You had a bad day

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

TICKLE TEST RESULT: WHAT's BEHIND YOUR EMOTION

Your strongest belief is honesty. 48% of test takers also hold honesty as an important value in life.

Because of your uncompromisingly honest nature, you generally feel most fulfilled when you can fully share your thoughts and feelings, good or bad.

People likely come to you when they need a forthright opinion because they know you are brave enough to tell your version of the truth, and you enjoy being around people who are forthcoming with their thoughts and opinions as well. Those around you have come to expect that you will generally "tell it like it is." You may feel that any untruth, even a little white lie, will lead to more harm than good. Your emotional intolerance for dishonesty — in yourself and others — makes you a highly trustworthy person.

*************************************************************************************

i really don't know if i agree to this result or not..my mind's not functioning well.. i'm jaded..